‘If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to. If you are not afraid of dying, there is nothing you cannot achieve.’
Lao Tzu
Ms. Hayden representing the whale dynasty Loll 

Ms. Hayden representing the whale dynasty Loll 

I’m creating an album, for my dad/alcoholism, using this song and a few others as inspiration.  I’m creating my own songs from scratch with the country/rock/folk genres incorporated with my own music/loops/beats, singing, and covering a few songs like this one:

"As Hope And Promise Fade"

As hope and promise fade
And the sun forgets to rise
I’m lonely and I’m thirsty
But it’s better I stay dry
No more than two drinks away
From crying

Stare into the glass
And wait for the time to pass
And thank you for the offer
But you know I must decline
Never more than two drinks awawy
From crying

There used to be a time
When I could hold my head up high
My life layed out before me
Rivers flow with wine
I had my love beside me
And everything was fine
But now the ride is over
It’s hard to say goodbye

As hope and promise fade
And midnight turns to day
Well I’m tired and I’m thirsty
But it’s better I stay dry
Never more than two drinks away
From crying…
From crying…
I feel accomplished. In terms of knowing myself, I have spent almost a year now finding and enriching my mind, body, and soul. Sounds pretty cliche’ I know but I have found happiness in growing those 3 things. Currently, my graduation timer reads 25days22hours38minutes07seconds! After I complete a group project, 8-10page paper,  self-evaluation paper, and a “Comprehensive Business Exam” I will have completed all the necessary requirements for my Accounting & Finance Bachelors Degree! 
I feel scared. Around the corner from me is a huge stepping stone, a mile stone (possibly a 2,000mile mile stone.) I will be saving up roughly $5,000 and leaving the state of Ohio. My limitations are only bound by my mind, body, & soul. I need to keep a can-do attitude that i’ve had. I need to consistently remind myself to keep growing and to never just settle for anything less than the best. The best takes work, you must start from the bottom of the barrel and work your way up. It is much better to start from nothing and become something, I know this. I must have patience. 
I feel wired, wired for success. I have taken many hits over the last 24 years. I have done my best to square up with those fists from life and counter them. I have become elusive, both in the mind and body. My soul continues to quest. I know I have the ability to take on whatever God throws at me because I know he will only throw at me what he knows I can handle. Vince Lambardi once said something similar to this,” you don’t win once in a while, it’s not a one time thing, winning is a habit. ” Winning is a habit, exercise is a habit, challenging the mind, body, and soul must all be made a habit to grow, to succeed. Over the last year, I have kept that idea of habit in the back of my head and I can feel growth everywhere. Inside and out and I will continue to grow. Let the next chapter in life begin December 3th 2012. 

I feel accomplished. In terms of knowing myself, I have spent almost a year now finding and enriching my mind, body, and soul. Sounds pretty cliche’ I know but I have found happiness in growing those 3 things. Currently, my graduation timer reads 25days22hours38minutes07seconds! After I complete a group project, 8-10page paper,  self-evaluation paper, and a “Comprehensive Business Exam” I will have completed all the necessary requirements for my Accounting & Finance Bachelors Degree! 

I feel scared. Around the corner from me is a huge stepping stone, a mile stone (possibly a 2,000mile mile stone.) I will be saving up roughly $5,000 and leaving the state of Ohio. My limitations are only bound by my mind, body, & soul. I need to keep a can-do attitude that i’ve had. I need to consistently remind myself to keep growing and to never just settle for anything less than the best. The best takes work, you must start from the bottom of the barrel and work your way up. It is much better to start from nothing and become something, I know this. I must have patience. 

I feel wired, wired for success. I have taken many hits over the last 24 years. I have done my best to square up with those fists from life and counter them. I have become elusive, both in the mind and body. My soul continues to quest. I know I have the ability to take on whatever God throws at me because I know he will only throw at me what he knows I can handle. Vince Lambardi once said something similar to this,” you don’t win once in a while, it’s not a one time thing, winning is a habit. ” Winning is a habit, exercise is a habit, challenging the mind, body, and soul must all be made a habit to grow, to succeed. Over the last year, I have kept that idea of habit in the back of my head and I can feel growth everywhere. Inside and out and I will continue to grow. Let the next chapter in life begin December 3th 2012. 

42days18hours49minutes1second

Currently it is Friday October 26th 2012 @ 6am.

I have a lot on my mind, mostly positive. New hobbies, interest, goals and personal growth are all on my main agenda. School is only apart of my life once every other Monday so I have had plenty of time to begin building the new me. I randomly got this urge for theater which is really weird because I never really cared for the arts. I have been teaching myself how to sing and soon how to ballroom dance. By teaching myself how to sing I feel as though I will be more confident in my voice and teaching myself how to ballroom dance will allow me to find better class of women when the time comes. The biggest influence of this arts fasination stems from Harden Panettiere on the show Nashville followed by Dave Kaminksi (sp), a regular at planest fitness. On another note, my buddy from work, Nick Broyels, just completed his last day on the job at Planet Fitness before he moves to San Diego. This is of interest to me. It could be my way to the west coast to try to find a different style of living, job searching, and starting a new life altogether. He said he would be more than happy to have me visit him, his wife Ashley, his cousin Aime, and her husband Steve for a couple weeks to get the feel for California and life out on my own. Until then I will be saving money for a couple months after I graduate with my Bachelors degree in Accounting & Finance so I can pay down some school loans and my motorcycle payment. Currently I have a bad case of senioritis with only 42 days 18 hours 49 minutes 1 second until i graduate. My number one priority needs to be school and landing a “career” job.

I wanted to share my thoughts as I thought of them. This should not be read with proper grammar in mind!

You must learn the rules of the game & learn to play better than anyone else.
anonymous
Hero’s get remembered but legends never die.
Generation Y.
Receptionist: Don't you feel like your generation is just lazy?
Me: Lazy? I'd say apathetic.
Receptionist: Isn't it the same?
Me: No. My generation is criticized and toiled with, and I don't see why not - just turn on the TV and watch what they're feeding us. But my generation is not lazy. My generation fought in Iraq and Afghanistan. My generation fought for womens rights in a fury that hadn't been seen since the 19th Amendment. My generation got our first black President elected. My generation fought for Gay rights for the first time in American history. And with all that, we are apathetic, and that's because things aren't going to be better for us down the road. We are the first generation expected to make less than our parents. We are the first generation to see America lost its status as a super power. We've lived through the worst economic times since the Great Depression, and are forced to take out thousands of dollars in student loans at the same time, all while our college degrees slowly turn into a highschool diploma. We've done plenty, and expect nothing. So no, I wouldn't say we're lazy, just apathetic.